so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
