god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize