You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
