If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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