How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
porn star boner night. come get it.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
