I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
