i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
