She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
