My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
