im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
