I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Green mimosas i think yes
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
