shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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