I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
