oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
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