come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize