It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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