Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
