I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Define "chronic" masturbator.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
