She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
