Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
