Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
