are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Randomize