I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
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