Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
