literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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