You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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