I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
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