the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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