he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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