none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
