I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
That reminds me...we need to get swords
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
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