I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
