Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
