This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
