i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
