He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
