erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize