She swung at the pinata with crutches
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize