i think my mom watched the whole time
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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