im about as happy as oj after his trial
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
