Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
