oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
