I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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