well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Randomize
