Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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