some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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