using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize