Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Green mimosas i think yes
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize
