we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
