Nicole vs. Life
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
