She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
